Self love is a popular term these days. We see it on Instagram and Facebook, we hear it in pop songs, we even buy “self-love” mugs on Etsy. But do we really know what self-love means?
Dr. Khoshaba wrote in Psychology Today that self-love is the state of appreciation for oneself that grows from actions that support one’s physical, psychological, and spiritual growth.
Journaling is one of the best ways to enhance self-love. However, to maximize on the benefits of self-love practice through journaling, you first have to understand the concepts behind it.
It’s not enough to just say you love yourself, because you have to show yourself you love yourself in order for your brain to actually believe you feel that way. When you achieve full self-love, you trigger your brain’s self-care and self-awareness systems which creates an opportunity for you to become more aware of your needs, feelings, and thoughts. By journaling or writing down your own thoughts and feelings, you can reflect on things going well for you as well as areas of improvement. In this sense, self-love is something that can be learned.
As a woman and a mother, I struggled with self love in my past because I often felt like I was being selfish when I desired spending time with myself. When you're busy taking care of everyone else, it's easy to forget about yourself. The result? You feel depleted, burnt out, and resentful. That's why I decided to start making the time to get to know myself again--in the best way possible: through journaling and self-reflection.
I learned through journaling and self-reflection that when I love myself, I make myself a priority. I focus on my spiritual, mental, and physical health. I create a space to refuel and reignite my passion for life and embrace gratitude. As you embark on your self-love journey, try these tips below to fall in love with yourself :
Try these tips and discover greater self-love:
Remember your victories. View yourself in a positive light more often. One of the easiest ways to do this is to remember your triumphs. Maybe you hit a homerun and won the game in 5th grade. Remember your high school graduation day. Think about that time you received a promotion.
1. Most people spend plenty of time remembering their failures. Try doing the opposite for a month and see what happens!
2. Volunteer. Volunteering is a great way to boost your self-esteem. It’s easier to love yourself when you see yourself as a good person. Put your attention on someone else. You’ll enjoy the mental break, and your opinion of yourself will get a boost. You’re a good person, so remind yourself of that from time to time.
3. Be a good friend. You know how to be a good friend, but there are times that you’re not. Being a good friend makes you feel good about yourself. It will also improve the way your friends view and treat you, too. Everyone wins when you decide to be a good friend.
4. Forgive yourself. You’ve made a few mistakes. Who hasn’t? However, it’s time to forgive yourself. Give yourself a break. You would do the same for someone you care about, so do it for yourself.
5. Pursue what you need rather than what you want. What you want is rarely what you need. Once you’ve taken care of your needs, you’ll be in a better position to acquire what you want. Satisfying your needs is a prime example of self-love.
6. Get in shape. Take care of your body. When you’re eating poorly and not getting enough exercise, you’re harming yourself. Obviously, this isn’t a good example of self-love. Show yourself that you take your health seriously. You’re loving yourself every time you eat a healthy meal or exercise your body.
7. Appreciate your uniqueness. We tend to be embarrassed about our qualities, skills, or abilities that are unique. However, the most valuable parts of you are those that are different from others. The fact that you have an elbow doesn’t make you special.
8. Practice gratitude. Be grateful for your body, mind, and uniqueness. Be grateful for everything in your life. Your life is better than you think. You are better than you think. Be grateful, and you’ll start to believe that you deserve more love from yourself.
9. Be as kind to yourself as you would be to anyone else. To be kinder to others than you are to yourself is just showing everyone, including yourself, that you don’t respect yourself. At the end of the day, there’s no one looking out for you. You’ll have to take on this responsibility yourself.
Self-love is an important part of your self-awareness and self-development. Without self-love, your success and happiness face a huge obstacle.
In order to build self-esteem, you need to focus on taking care of yourself first. Start with journaling and getting your emotions out on paper. Make it a daily practice, and you'll find that you're less anxious, more focused on the present moment, and generally happier with your life.